Cord-Cutting Rituals & How to Break a Soul Tie (and 5 Easy Cord-Cutting Rituals to Do At Home, or Anywhere)
Cord cutting is one of the most powerful rituals you can do.
You can rescue yourself from energy vampires, heal your emotions, and walk forward without dragging the past behind you.
Whether you’re cutting ties with an ex, a toxic parent, a once-beloved friend, or a work colleague, remember this: You are the only one who can stop the suffering.
You are allowed to be free. We can’t change people. But we can change the way we allow them to affect us.
With the tools in this tutorial, you can:
Dissolve the toxic connection and no longer obsess about or fear the person.
Protect your energy field from future attachments.
Attract only those who are emotionally available and kind.
Stay grounded in situations where cutting cords isn’t fully possible.
If you’ve seen online rituals with figural candles wrapped in twine and wildly burning away for hours — and don’t feel comfortable with any of that — just know that you can cut cords in many different ways. Including through visualization, affirmations, or even drawing symbols on a piece of paper.
Many people ask: “Do I have to hate the person in order to cut cords?” No, you can love someone and still cut the cords that keep you bound to them. This is about your well-being, not punishing them.
What about family, a boss, or a coworker — someone you see every day? You can still cut cords with them. Cord cutting doesn’t remove them physically—it removes the emotional entanglement.
Can energetic cords grow back or reattach? Yes, but only if you allow them to. If that should happen, repeat your cord-cutting ritual. Some attachments are stubborn.
The more you practice, the faster (and more permanently) they dissolve.
What You’ll Learn in This Cord-Cutting Tutorial
If you keep reading, you’ll learn (in the following order)
What soul ties are and why you should care
The difference between soul ties and cords
How soul ties are formed
7 signs you may have an unhealthy soul tie with someone
How and why to break a soul tie or cut cords with someone
Step-by-step rituals to cut cords with: a former friend, a family member, a former romantic relationship, and/or a dangerous or abusive person
What to expect after performing a cord cutting ritual
How to protect yourself after cord cutting (many different options)
How to call in healthier relationships: 4 rituals to try
Legal Disclaimer: Rosetta Magdalen LLC (dba Charm Your Life / Tarot + Magic) is not liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, consequential, or punitive damages arising from your use and interpretation of the information provided in this article. This content does not, in any way, constitute legal, financial, or professional advice.
Ready? Let’s get into it.
Want to go straight to the cord-cutting ritual instructions? Just scroll down to 5 Easy Cord-Cutting Rituals, and find the section that’s right for your situation.
Soul Ties Meaning: What Are Soul Ties and How Are They Formed?
There are many reasons why we develop stubborn energetic cords with other people. But the one that people ask about most frequently is something called “soul ties.”
In spiritual and occult contexts, both soul ties and cords refer to energetic connections between individuals, but they differ in their nature and function.
A soul tie is a broader term for a deep, often profound, connection between two souls, sometimes associated with sexual intimacy or strong emotional bonds.
Cords are the energetic pathways through which this connection is maintained, and they can be healthy or unhealthy depending on the relationship.
Can you have unhealthy cords with a person and not also have a soul tie with them? Definitely. In my opinion the “soul tie” concept is often a rationale for why we can’t seem to break away from someone. But, usually, it’s just an excuse for an unhealthy connection that we’re afraid to let go of.
Soul Ties (as they are commonly defined):
A spiritual or energetic bond between two people, often described as a deep, sometimes inexplicable, connection.
Soul ties are often associated with sexual relationships, where bodily fluids and energetic exchange are believed to occur.
But let’s not take this sexual thing too far. A soul tie is a deep, binding connection between two people that can be purely emotional or spiritual. They can form in any relationship, including platonic and familial.
Vows, promises, or covenants made between individuals can create soul ties. These ties are often seen as binding and enduring, requiring intentional effort to break.
Shared experiences, whether positive or negative, can contribute to the formation of soul ties. For example, serving in the military often leads to strong bonds among personnel due to its unique challenges and camaraderie.
Shared spiritual beliefs, practices, or experiences are also believed to form soul ties. These connections are thought to be rooted in a shared spiritual energy or essence that binds individuals together.
Soul ties can be positive or negative, healthy or unhealthy, depending on the nature of the relationship and how it impacts the individuals involved. Extreme anger or unforgiveness can create a negative soul tie or energetic attachment.
Positive soul ties can strong, supportive relationships. Negative soul ties can lead to unhealthy attachments, emotional dependence, and a sense of being drained or controlled by the other person.
Cords:
Energetic cords are the invisible pathways through which energy, emotions, and information flow between individuals.
Cords are formed as a result of any kind of powerful connection between individuals, whether it’s romantic, familial, platonic, or even transactional.
Healthy cords provide mutual love and support, where both people feel stronger and happier because of their connection.
Unhealthy cords can drain energy, foster codependency, and create a sense of being controlled or manipulated and loss of a free and independent identity.
Cords can be felt as sensations in the body, such as tingling, heat, or emotional heaviness where they attach.
So, a “soul tie” is the concept of a deep connection between two souls and “cords” are the energy pathway through which that connection becomes strong and difficult to break.
Energy is exchanged from one of the persons to the other (as in a one person feeding on the energy of another as an energy vampire or parasitical relationship) or mutually exchanged by both.
7 Signs You May Have an Unhealthy Soul Tie With Someone
Difficulty letting go: Finding it challenging to move on from a past relationship or connection, even when it’s no longer healthy or beneficial.
Feeling drained or influenced: Feeling emotionally or energetically drained after interactions with a particular person, or sensing their emotions and thoughts strongly influencing your own.
Shared dreams or telepathic connections: Experiencing shared dreams, synchronicities, or a sense of knowing what the other person is thinking or feeling without verbal communication.
Unresolved issues: Continuously experiencing unresolved issues or patterns in relationships that seem to stem from a previously formed soul tie. For example, long after ending a relationship, you may struggle to trust new partners.
Feeling tied to a place or object: Feeling a strong attachment or connection to a specific place, object, or symbol that reminds you of a person or past experience.
Physical sensations: Experiencing physical sensations, such as tingling, buzzing, warmth, or discomfort, when thinking about or being near the person you have a soul tie with.
Intuitive ‘knowing’: Having an intuitive sense of when the other person is about to reach out to you, known as ‘telephone telepathy.’
How and Why to Cut Energetic Cords or Break a Soul Tie
When you can’t stop thinking of a person or situation and these obsessive thoughts are getting in the way of your health and happiness, and you feel bound to a person, a memory, or a situation, it’s worth giving cord cutting a try.
Energetic cords can live on, even years or decades after an event and after the person involved is no longer living on this Earth.
You may feel drained, haunted by memories, or emotionally stuck. This is the effect of what healers and energy workers call cords.
It may feel scary or too painful to think about cutting emotional bonds with someone you love (or have loved), but it’s the only way to disconnect from them enough that you can see your life clearly and know what you want – outside their influence.
These cords don’t break just because time passes. They require intentional release—especially when the other person is (or was) controlling, manipulative, or emotionally abusive.
They many not even be trying to stay attached to you. What is keeping the bond alive may be your own internal pain body (emotional or psychic pain that lives within you almost as a separate being) and can’t find a way to let go.
Cutting cords isn’t about forgetting people or pretending something didn’t happen. It’s about removing their grip on your energy.
Only you can know when you’re truly ready to detach from their energy in your life. There’s no right or wrong answer. You’re in control of the timeline.
What a Cord-Cutting Ritual Can Do
Bring relief from obsessive thoughts about what went wrong, what you should have done, what they should have done, wishing you had never met them, wishing they were different . . . .
Help you let go of the past and move on to a happier life after breakups or betrayal.
Set you free from harmful influences that you can’t seem to leave alone.
Stop energy vampires from draining you and hurting you again and again.
Restore your confidence and freedom (or allow you to experience it for the first time).
6 Reasons Cord-Cutting is Worth a Try
You constantly think about someone who’s no longer in your life.
You feel that you’ll never be ok because of someone who’s harmed you (parents, siblings, other relatives, bullies, abusive teachers . . . anyone).
You feel sick, anxious, or emotionally heavy when thinking about them.
You have recurring dreams or nightmares involving them.
You feel like part of your energy is still “with” them (and this fools you into thinking that you’re meant to be with them).
You’ve tried talking it out, journaling, or therapy—but still feel stuck.
What About Family Members: Does Cord-Cutting Mean You Cut Them Out of Your Life?
Does cord cutting mean you never see or speak to the person again? Not necessarily.
It’s all up to you.
What if they’re a family member or friend, and you still want to be part of a family or friend group — but that means you still must come in contact with the problem person.
Cord cutting may help you to deal with the person, but without any pain or fear. You’re simply no longer under their influence. Or no longer tortured by painful residue of the past.
You can see them in a social situation, and feel nothing toward them. Their words bounce off, they mean nothing to you, and your inner peace stays intact.
More on this in the cord-cutting aftercare section of this tutorial.
5 Easy Cord-Cutting Rituals
The Easiest Cord-Cutting (All You Need is a Pair of Scissors)
Let’s start with an easy ritual you can do anytime, anywhere.
If you don’t have scissors with you, when you come to step 4 just make the “snip-snip” gesture with the index and middle fingers of each hand.
Sit quietly, close your eyes, and breathe deeply. Inhale for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts. Do this until your body starts to relax and feel safe.
Visualize the person you’re cutting cords with standing in front of you—silently, no talking. Picture a dark cord (or cords) connecting you and them. It might come from your heart, gut, or even your throat.
Acknowledge the cord. Feel it, don’t judge it. Accept it as a connection that once existed—for better or worse.
Hold the scissors in your hands. Imagine cutting the cord cleanly. Picture it dropping to the ground, dissolving into dust.
Say out loud or in your head:
“I release this connection. It no longer serves me. I take back my energy now.”Breathe deeply again. Imagine warm light or clean air filling the space where that cord once lived.
Open your eyes. Let the silence sit with you. You’ve just cleared a bond.
Cutting Cords with a Former Friend
Friendships can end painfully, especially when betrayal, competition, or manipulation is involved. Here’s a way to release the attachment.
You’ll need a small piece of paper, a pen, a spool of black thread, a pair of scissors, a fire-safe bowl or cauldron, and matches or a lighter.
On a piece of paper, write their name and a few sentences about what happened. Fold it away from you several times, until you have a small square or rectangular packet.
Tie the black thread tightly around the packet several times to bind their influence on you.
Take another piece of black thread and tie it around the part of your body where you feel the energetic cord is connecting you to them and then knot it around the paper you wrote.
Firmly grasping the thread that connects your body to the packet that represents them, confidently say: “I am no longer connected to ___________________ (name the person). They can no longer affect me in any harmful way. And so it is!”
Cut the thread while imagining your emotional energy returning to your body and feeling released from the bond.
Burn the packet in a fire-safe bowl (do this carefully, near water or outside).
Let the ashes cool, then dispose of them: flush them down the toilet, throw them into the garbage a few blocks away from your house, throw them into a body of water (river, lake, or ocean), or if the person lives near you, throw the ashes into their yard or in front of their building (to symbolize that what they’ve done to you is being returned back to them).
This simple act will shift the energy between you and the former friend—even if they don’t feel it, you will.
Cutting Cords with Family Members
Cutting cords with toxic family doesn’t mean you don’t love them. It means you love yourself enough to detach and say “No more!”
You’ll need a small piece of paper, a pencil, a spool of black thread, nail polish remover or vinegar, and a small jar you’re willing to throw away.
On a small piece of paper, write down the most important ways in which this person harmed you, and how their energy affects you today. Fold it away from you several times, until you have a small square or rectangular packet.
Tie the black thread tightly around the packet several times to bind their influence on you.
Place the letter in the bottom of a small jar and pour nail polish remover or vinegar over it, dissolving the strength of the painful memories you have about them.
Firmly place the lid on the jar, and while vigorously shaking it, say: “You now walk your path away from me. I now walk my path away from you. You are free and I am free. Your expectations, your pain, and the past (fill in what you want to say here) no longer have any power over me. If you can’t be good, begone!”
When you see that the writing on your paper has blurred or dissolved, stop shaking the jar, carry it a few blocks away from your home, and strenuously throw it into a garbage can. Turn and walk away. Don’t look back and know that you are free.
If you still need to see the family member(s) at events, consider enchanting a special piece of jewelry to protect you. I love this heart-shaped mirror pendant that you can enchant to protect you by sending back their negativity to them by reflection. You can enchant it before any event where you’ll be in their presence. Just hold the heart in your hand and say something like, “Shield me from whatever ___________ (name of person) says or does, and return to sender.”
You’re sending all harmful things about them directly back to their energy field. You can mentally repeat, “Not mine. Not mine. Not mine!”
Cutting Cords with a Former Lover or Spouse
Love bonds are so strong that they often become prisons. If it’s time to set yourself free from emotional pain, try this.
You’ll need an relationship souvenir that you’re willing to release, a spool of black thread, and a pair of scissors.
Find an object that represents the relationship (a gift, photo, or even just a piece of paper with their name).
Wrap it loosely in black thread.
Hold it in both hands and say:
“This connection brought me lessons. Now I release the pain, the longing, and the wounds. I take back what belongs to me.”Cut the thread deliberately and slowly.
Place the object in a bag or box and remove it from your home. Donate, discard, or bury it—whatever feels final to you.
You might cry. That’s okay. Grief is part of healing. You’re releasing the energetic charge, not pretending nothing happened.
Cutting Cords with a Dangerous or Abusive Person
This is the most serious and sacred use of cord cutting. When someone has caused harm—physically, emotionally, or psychologically—you deserve peace and protection.
You’ll need a small piece of paper, a spool of black thread, a small white candle (birthday candle, tea light, or 4” household candle that will burn out in less than an hour), a pair of scissors, and a flame-proof container or cauldron.
Write the person’s name and how they hurt you on paper.
Wrap the paper tightly in thread.
Light your white candle and speak:
“You have no power here. Your energy is not welcome. I cut all ties between us, known and unknown.”Cut the thread with force. If you need to say it louder—do it. This is your moment.
Burn the paper in a safe container.
Stand in silence, hands over your heart. Say:
“I am whole. I am safe. YOU ARE GONE!”
IMPORTANT: If you ever feel unsafe in real life, this ritual should be paired with real-world steps: block their number, file reports, change locks, get to safety. Magic supports action.
Cutting Cords to an Addiction, Destructive Behavior, or Bad Habit
You may have wondered: Can I use these rituals to sever a bond to something in my own life that I want to change? Yes!
Do you have a pattern of self-saboutage in a certain area of your life? You can cut cords with it.
Do you need extra, spiritual help (in addition to practical steps you’re already taking) to deal with an addiction (whether to a substance, a habit, or other obsessive behavior)?
You can cut the cords that attach you to that behavior.
Feel free to adapt any of the rituals above to your situation.
For example, instead of a person’s name, you’ll be writing the behavior you want to change on your petition paper.
Just be sure that you are also taking all of the right actions in your 3D life to deal with the problem. Cord cutting can make it easier to follow through on those practical actions — and keep following through on a consistent basis.
Aftercare: What to Expect After Cord Cutting
Cord cutting can be emotional. You might feel lighter, relieved, tired, or even temporarily sad. This is completely normal.
Drink Water: Tranformation needs the cleansing power of water.
Rest: Take it easy for a few hours or even a day.
Journal: Write down what came up during the ritual, so you can begin to understand or process any revelations that may have surfaced.
Don’t Reattach: Avoid texting them “one last time.” That’s how cords grow back.
Repeat the Ritual, if Necessary: Sometimes strong cords need multiple sessions.
Most importantly, trust that something has shifted. Even if your mind doubts it, your energy is already moving forward.
After a strong cord cutting, the space in your energy field can feel open—sometimes raw. Protecting yourself and that space while it heals is like bandaging a wound. It doesn’t mean you’re weak; it means your spirit knows what you need.
Keep reading to find out how to use herbs, stones, or talismans to assist you. Cord cutting is powerful—but what you do now is how you make your life truly your own.
Protecting Yourself After Cord Cutting: Herbs, Stones & Auric Defense
Once you’ve cut emotional cords, it’s important to shield your energy so the connection doesn’t reattach. Some people—especially toxic or manipulative ones—have a way of reaching back out, emotionally or energetically, even when you’re trying to move on.
Here are simple tools and practices to keep your energetic field strong, clean, and untouchable.
Protective Herbs
Herbs can be used in smoke cleansing, baths, sachets, or oils to create a natural energetic barrier. Here are the most effective for post-cord cutting:
Rosemary: Excellent all-purpose herb for purifying spaces and knowing and performing the right action at the right time. It’s a strong, fearless plant that helps to protect women from harm.
Bay Leaf: Creates a spiritual shield around your space. You can write names or intentions on the leaves before burning.
Mugwort: Helps ward off evil, and to remove lingering attachments. Divine protection.
Protection Sachet: Combine dried rosemary, bay leaf, and a pinch of salt in a small cloth bag. Carry in your pocket or place under your pillow after the ritual.
Protective Stones
Carrying or wearing grounding stones helps maintain your own energetic space, connects with your innate power and wisdom, and stops cords from reattaching.
Black Tourmaline: Absorbs negativity and sends it right back to the source.
Obsidian: Slices through emotional manipulation like a blade. Use after cutting cords with narcissists or abusers.
Hematite: Grounds your energy and keeps others’ energy out.
Labradorite: Forms a barrier around your aura and is ideal when you still need to interact with someone you’ve cut cords with.
Carry a small stone in your pocket, wear as jewelry, or place one by your front door.
Protection Talismans & Wards
Mirror Charm: Place a small mirror facing outward on your door, bed, desk — or wherever your problem person may show up. Or wear a mirror charm necklace. It reflects any negative energy back to the sender.
Thread Knot Talisman: Tie nine knots in a black string, repeating a protection phrase (or different phrases) as you tie each knot. (“I now tie your hands.” “I now bind your feet.” “I now make your brain incapable of thoughts of me.” “None of your body parts can now harm me.” Or whatever is specific to your situation. Hang near your bed or door, pin it to your clothing, or whatever makes you feel more in control.
Iron Nail: Drive one into the ground at each corner outside your home or place a small one under your bed for warding.
Salt: Sprinkle across thresholds or windowsills after ritual work. Add a pinch to your bathwater to “seal” the body.
Red Thread: In folk practices around the world, red thread acts as a shield. Tie around your wrist or wear around your neck with the intent of protection and removal of past ties.
IMPORTANT: As always, none of these folk magic practices are a stand-in or replacement from filing a restraining order, getting to safety, and doing the practical self-protection activities that you need to do. Truly evil people will likely not change. You are changing yourself and your magnetic field, not changing them outside their will.
Malevolent people and their energetic fields can be very strong, and it may take regular cord-cutting as well as practical self-protection steps to disconnect them.
Daily Energetic Defense Practices
To keep others out of your field long-term, consistency is key. Here are daily rituals that act as “armor” for your aura:
Smoke Cleanse: Wave smoke from rosemary, mugwort, or even protection incense around your body each morning. Focus on the head, heart, and gut—places where cords often form.
Shower Visualization: As water runs over you, imagine it washing away emotional residue. See it draining away with the water.
Speak a Daily Boundary Affirmation: “Only my energy lives in my space. No one may enter without my permission.”
Mirror Shield: Visualize a glowing mirror surface around your body, reflecting all outside influence away. Do this before difficult conversations or returning to toxic environments.
Avoid Emotional Over-Disclosure: Cords often form when we share deeply personal feelings with someone who doesn’t deserve our trust. Save your vulnerability for safe spaces.
Calling In Healthier Relationships & Transforming the Toxic
Cutting cords removes what drains you. Now it’s time to rebuild your energetic field to attract the relationships you actually want—and continue to distance yourself from the ones that can’t be fully severed.
Now, it’s about becoming a vibrational match to healthy love, respect, and peace—and letting the rest fall away.
Visualization: Attracting Healthy, Respectful Relationships
Use this once a week or after each cord cutting ritual.
Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and take three deep breaths.
Picture a warm light in your chest—steady, glowing, and clear.
Imagine this light expanding outward until it surrounds your whole body like a soft golden shield.
Say silently or out loud:
“Only those who respect me, uplift me, and honor my truth are allowed into my life.”
“I am surrounded by people who see me clearly, love me fully, and treat me well.”As you breathe, picture new people walking toward you from the horizon—smiling, safe, supportive. Let yourself feel what it would be like to connect with them.
Finish by saying:
“I am open to real love, true support, and genuine connection. I call it in now.”
Magnetize Positive People Into Your Life
Create this honey jar during the waxing moon or on a Sunday sometime between 6 am and 12 noon.
You’ll need a small jar of honey, a small piece of paper, a pen, a cinnamon stick.
On a small piece of paper, write the qualities you want in your relationships (for example, honest, giving, loyal). Fold the piece of paper toward you three times and place it deep in your jar of honey.
Stir the honey jar (with the paper in it) clockwise slowly three times using the cinnamon stick, saying: “As honey is sticky and sweet, so do people with (name the the qualities you’ve written) stick to me and are sweet to me. I attract kindness, truth, and support.”
Sleep with the honey jar on your night stand or carry it in your purse (make sure the lid is screwed on tightly). You want to see the jar often in your daily life and remind yourself that it’s working.
Reactivate it by stirring or warming the jar with your hands every Sunday.
Every time someone good comes into your life, thank your honey jar, write that person’s name on a tiny slip of paper, fold it toward you three times, and add it to your jar.
Affirmations for Calling In Higher-Vibe People
Repeat these during your morning routine, while walking, or anytime you feel doubt creeping in:
“The people I attract now meet me with respect and truth.”
“It is safe for me to release those who cannot grow.”
“I am only visible to mentally and emotionally healthy, loving, giving people.”
“My boundaries are clear. My heart is open—but only to what loves and supports me.”
“Every day, my life becomes filled with more love, peace, and support.”
“I am only guided to people who are truly loving and good.”
Emergency Steps When With a Triggering Person
Here are some steps to use before being in the presence of someone with whom you’ve cut cords.
Great for family events, meeting with an ex, or stressful work conversations.
Close your eyes and imagine them in front of you—not how they act, but as a quiet silhouette.
Visualize their emotional energy as a color (maybe red, grey, or static).
Now imagine your body surrounded by a calm, neutral mist. It grows thicker until their energy cannot reach you.
Say to yourself: “I do not absorb what is not mine. I am calm. I am unmoved.”
Then, imagine that their energy begins to shift color—fading from chaos into something neutral or softer.
Say: “May they be at peace with themselves, so they have no need to disturb my life.”
